Saturday, 9 May 2020

Genesis 38 Tamar: All Honour Sacrificed



Life can be messy and chaotic. Sometimes you got to wonder why God would be bothered to get involved in the mess our lives can sometimes be. Often the messiness comes because we walk our own journey without really including God. Yet God works in our messiness for his own plans.
Judah walks his own path separate from his family and God. He definitely has cracks in his life. He sold his brother, deceived his father, letting Jacob believe Joseph is dead, and then Judah marries a pagan woman. Still God blesses Judah and he has three sons; Er, Onan and Shelah. But Judah’s sons do the same thing as Judah; walking their own paths without paying attention to God. Judah finds his oldest son Er a wife named Tamar. When God kills Er because of his wickedness, Judah tells his second son Onan to have a child with Tamar to keep his brother’s name alive. But Onan uses Tamar like a prostitute, using her for sex while making sure she never gets pregnant. Onan dishonours Tamar; shaming her. God kills Onan.
This is a hard story; it’s about abuse. Tamar is used and abused and put aside when Judah feels threatened, only God looks out for her. Even though God kills Er and Onan, Tamar still suffers abuse, rejection, and abandonment. She’s put aside, her voice and future taken away from her. In times of stress, abuse grows behind closed doors, women and children get hurt and their dignity and worth gets stripped away. Alberta has some of the highest rates of abuse in Canada. How can we, as a church, be a safe place for those who are abused to seek help, to share their stories, to regain their dignity and worth as precious children of God that Jesus went to the cross for, in order to bring shalom: peace, rightness, restored relationships where we are built up instead of torn down, where potential is developed and invested in instead of beaten down? If you are in an abusive situation, please call a women's shelter, the police or us and we will walk with you through this.

Question: these are hard stories; how can we help people who are bullied? How can you let someone know how much Jesus loves them?

Judah’s family life is messy and chaotic, even worse than his father Jacob’s family. Judah’s afraid and wants to protect his youngest son from Tamar who seems to be attracting God’s anger. Judah sends Tamar back to her father until Shelah is old enough to marry; Judah has no intentions to let his last son marry her. Tamar goes home in disgrace, a shamed woman rejected by her husband’s family. Judah neglects his daughter-in-law’s needs as a helpless widow, needs he should be providing for. Rather than turning to God to make sense of what’s happening, Judah continues to walk his own path apart from God.
Judah stops letting God guide his life. Judah takes control of his life, depending on himself to make decisions on how to live. Judah loses touch with God and chaos shapes his life. This is an echo of our fall into sin, we figure we know better than God on how we should live. We want to be god of our own lives. This is why Jesus comes, to bring order and healing into our chaos and hurt. Jesus comes to bring the kingdom of heaven near again. The cross is Jesus’ way of establishing the kingdom of heaven here, pouring out the Holy Spirit into the world to help us recognize our need to Jesus and help us become part of bringing healing and hope back into the world. In our story today, a number of years pass when, “Judah’s wife, the daughter of Shua dies.”

Question: are there times in your life that you did your own thing instead of God’s? how did that work out?

One of the church’s prayers is, “Lord Jesus, have mercy on me, a sinner.” By doing this, we gain a sense of God’s presence and his grace and mercy; great values to guide us through the day. It comes from a desire to be more in tune with God and his will for us. Charles Sheldon's 1896 book, In His Steps is about a church that tries to live by the principle, “What would Jesus do?” Some Christians find this hard; they ask, “Can we really know what Jesus would do in different situations,” yet if we let Jesus’ values of love, mercy, grace and forgiveness guide us through prayer and Bible reading, I believe we can know what Jesus would do.
Tamar hears that Judah is going to be nearby and recognises that Judah has no plan to marry her to his youngest son, she crafts a plan to honour her first husband by dishonouring herself. Not sure if this is what Jesus would do, but she is desperate. Tamar disguises herself as a prostitute in order to give her dead husband a child and carry on his family name by tempting Judah. Judah uses Tamar and gives her his personal seal and staff because he has no money on him. Tamar sees that she can’t trust Judah. God blesses Tamar and she becomes pregnant; Judah condemns her, then Tamar reveals that he’s the father by presenting his seal and staff as proof. Judah confesses, “She is more righteous than I… Since I wouldn’t give her to my son Shelah.”
A former mentor said, this sordid story where Judah impregnates his daughter-in-law does not thwart God’s plans to bless the world through Abraham.” This story is an expression of God’s grace. Tamar’s illegitimate son finds a place in Jesus’ family tree as Tamar’s blessed with twins; Perez and Zerah. Perez, an ancestor of Jesus, becomes a symbol of blessing by the time of Ruth and Boaz, We are witnesses. May the LORD make the woman who is coming into your home like Rachel and Leah, who together built up the family of Israel. May you have standing in Ephrathah and be famous in Bethlehem. Through the offspring the LORD gives you by this young woman, may your family be like that of Perez, whom Tamar bore to Judah.” Ruth and Boaz are blessed with a son so that Ruth’s first husband’s line doesn’t end in his death, just as Judah was supposed to do for Tamar. Ruth’s son is Obed, grandfather of King David, ancestor of Jesus. God works in and through the messes we create when we walk our own paths. God always works to draw us back to him.

Question: what have you learned about Jesus during the messy times of your life? What can you share with others about how Jesus was there?

Tamar sacrifices her honour and dignity out of faithfulness to her husband. Paul reminds us in his letter to the Philippians that Jesus also sacrifices his honour and “made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant... and became obedient to death---even death on a cross.” This was a shameful death, there’s no dignity in the cross, yet Jesus willingly walks that path in faithfulness to God. Jesus enters the messiness of life and experiences it all. Jesus shows us the path to God through faithfulness and obedience, to guide us through the messiness, and when the messiness gets chaotic and you can’t make sense of it, we find hope and peace in knowing that God’s in control and is with us.
Pastor Jim Dekker writes about Judah and Tamar,Jesus is revealed here by people who are broken jars of clay whom God mysteriously leads to do what must be done. God’s family members still today often break promises, or compromise ourselves. Paul says nobody should sin so grace may abound, but we should know our own self-absorbed hearts and desires. Then we should fall in awe before God and his mysterious forgiveness. I’m glad I can’t pick my relatives. I am thankful that God picked loved ones whom I might not like to be part of Jesus’ family. In the merciful power of forgiveness, strive to live in forgiveness, without trickery, deceit, envy, lust; with trust, hope, joy, gentleness, peace, joy, self-control, and love.”
We’re blessed in Bethel Church. Even in these difficult times, God’s providing for us. Part of being a follower of Jesus is to bless our community. Salvation’s not about going to heaven, but about living heaven here. How are we shaping our youth and their morals: modelling to our young men and women deep respect for each other out of Jesus’ love, protecting each other’s dignity and worth as children of God, building Godly character into our children and youth so they become godly men and women. We need to be a safe people for Lacombe; a church committed to protecting and blessing those in difficult situations and relationships, helping them to be safe and to recover their identity as daughters and sons of God and experience Jesus’ restoring love.

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